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Friday, March 25, 2005


The "I'm Too Sexy For My Blog" Project

Woohoo~! There are four sexy bloggerstm in Malaysia so far! We have Munkit, Auntie Lilian, Vernon and Chonghwa Lifestyle. I'm not sure how many more there are in our region but this is what I've gotten from PPS.

Famous Singapore blogger Mr.Brown came up with the "I'm Too Sexy For My Blog" project. A parody of the (now)world famous Xiaxue who stuck her tongue out and looked up when posing for a t-shirt brand which she is an ambassador for.

My turn!

I knew these pictures would come in handy someday:

  
Sorry for posting extremely unsexy photos. These were not meant for this project, hehe, but they were for my msn display photos.

For example, the first photo was used as an emoticon to tell friends, "hey hey, damn cute la that guy,". Sort of like a saliva dripping hamsap smile.

Took them sometime in October last year. As you can see, I still had my braces. I actually took a hell lot of photos. Click here to see me humiliate myself.

Jayelle's back and neck ached at 3:16:06 pm
  (4) glitter balls rolling.  | 

Wednesday, March 23, 2005


A Dream, Finally.

Whilst lying on the sofa downstairs half-heartedly flipping through my biology practical book(for the practical exam the following day) two days ago, I decided to see something else in my future besides the usual university degree, a husband, a family of my own, death etc.

I will own my own cosmetic line.

I was just thinking exactly what I can do with my degree(biotech+medical bioscience). I will obviously do the usual routine eg. Labs, research work etc. Gain some experience here and there and my family(maternal grandfather) partially owns Bodybasics, a personal care company.(They basically just produce the shampoo,talcum powder for brands like Pureen, Baby Carrie, Tracia etc.etc who pass them the formula that they want for their products). I could get some work experience there too in the future!

I knew that if I were to go into research I'd want to work for cosmetic giants like L'Oreal, Clinique, Stila and the likes. Once girly, always girly. I am very much into cosmetics. Have you seen my make-up table? Tubes of lip gloss and eyeshadow compacts are perched on top of each other and if you so much as run by my make-up table, glitter powder containers will roll off the table and ... I don't even want to think about the mess. I have to admit that I am guilty of not using most of the things I buy.. but I..I.. oh, I just can't find a reason! I just love looking at it! Happy?!

So there I was with the idea of working for cosmetic giants and realizing that I might have to migrate in order to achieve that dream of mine. I was wondering how in the world would I be able to persuade L'oreal to open a lab in Malaysia just so that I can have my dream job?

I started to laugh. Why would L'oreal even bat a (mascara-ed)eyelash at a mere biotechnology degree holder nobody?

Unless of course I migrate over to work my way up their whatever ladder they call it that you can climb in the lab hierarchy. Once I am of status over there, I could probably have a say and they'd probably pat me on my back and say, "Oei, that's a good idea!" and open a lab in Malaysia JUST for Jolene Lai the following week.

Bahahahahhahaa.

That is why I decided, "what the hell, might as well have my own cosmetic line."

That's it! My. Own. Cosmetic. Line!!

In that 15 minutes of wild thoughts I even considered doing a marketing course to help this "business" of mine expand.

I'll know that I've made it when I see my counter right next to Estee Lauder's. But then again, by the time my brand makes it to that level, I'd probably be where Estee Lauder is now: Dead.

But think of it! I can finally have my revenge on those cosmetic giants who sell an eyeshadow set that can cost me 50 bowls of chicken porridge. What do they want to do? Make me starve for 50 college days just so that I can have nice sparkly eyes? Crazy! 

That is why, my dear friends, I will also one day be a bad cosmetic giant and overcharge for a tube of glycerol.

Just think, the bimbos of the year 2060 (it's in the 60's, Dahling!) will be raving about my products and squealing to each other, "OHMYGOD YOU GOT A GENUINE JOLENE LAI PUPIL COLOURING PENCIL WITH GLITTER SPECKS? THAT IS LIKE SO COOL."

I'd be mentioned in chick literature as often as Manolos and Jimmy Choos get mentioned in this era's chick literature.

Magazines(Or rather E-zines, then) would conduct interviews with my daughter who would take over my business and she'd tell them, "Oh yes, my mother was a very powerful woman. The idea just fell upon her great mind one evening in early 2005. Yes, yes, that IS decades ago. Oh, how did glitter become the specialty of her products? Simple. Her passion for glitter just took it there."

**

Of course I would start off with peanuts la. I'd still be notches lower than Secrets(a local cosmetic brand that I never found attractive). Hsien said she'd be my accountant; I told her that'd be cool if she didn't mind having chap fan with me for a minimum of 5 years everyday.

Perhaps my brand can appeal to women of different age groups. I'd even cater for those pre-teens. I know,anything for money. Design the cutest illustrations for my packaging ala Stila. A selling point.
Different formulas for different ages. That's the idea!

I'll be doing something science related(read: making my father proud) and doing something I love. Two years back, a form5 classmate asked me after I organized the nail art booth for our school's canteen day, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" I replied, "A dentist". She was surprised and said, "Why, I'd thought you would want to be a beautician or something." I knew something more professional than a beautician would reap in a bigger income.
I think this ambition is a good combination of my passion and my need to stay in the science field.

Watch this space. :)

On a different note, I have successfully glitterized my two finger nails with the stationary glitter that I bought from Kinokuniya. Behold.


There you go! Yes, I was studying.


Another one with nicer lighting!

 
My gems. *kisses glitter jars*

Jayelle's back and neck ached at 8:41:53 pm
  (14) glitter balls rolling.  | 

Sunday, March 20, 2005


Hype Usually Disappoints

I wonder why Malaysians keep promoting Petaling Street to our foreign friends.(though our online version of it IS worth the promotion)

My dad dropped me, my mum, my Aunt Ping, her son Yong and his HK gf, Pearl at Petaling Street after dinner. I haven't been to Petaling Street in awhile and was looking forward to see what wares are there for me to spend my easy-earned allowances on. I don't understand WHY people even go there.

The first shop we went to was quite a nice accessories shop selling cheap hair stuff. Chopsticks for Rm1.50 each? That SHOULD be the price of chopsticks everywhere! Cousin's GF, Pearl, Mum and me bought some hair stuff from the guy. A claw hair clip, four chopsticks, three scrunchies, one hair pin? Only for Rm11.80? Very good!

Obviously once you make a purchase, you are a happier person right? Petaling Street can really make you sad.

There isn't even two metres in between each row of stalls. How the hell to walk? Sweaty Malaysians, Australians, Englishmen, Americans etc etc slide pass each other, literally. When I shop I don't want to be touching strangers! The crowd is so bad you can't even stop to look at the things they are selling.

NOT like there are things worth buying.

Oh! Pearl was passing by this chestnut stall and the hawker offered her one as a sample. I came up to them and I was also offered a chestnut. I tasted it and didn't really fancy having more so I moved into the handphone covers stall next door. Apparently, when I was gone, this was what happened:

My Aunty Ping came up to them and was also offered a sample. So my Aunty didn't like it either and was just slowly nibbling at it. The man then asked my cousin Yong if we would like to buy some. So my cousin brother asked for the least which was Rm2 for 150g.

The man then lost his temper and said, "Lei tei gom tor yan lor gom siu?"(There are so many of you yet you take so little?)

My cousin then said, "Hui tei tu ng chung yi sek"(They also don't like to eat).

The hawker grumbled, "Sek tou kom song,"(Eat until so nice). He directed that comment at my aunty who was still nibbling at the roasted chestnut daintily.

The hawker continued, "Lei tei sek chor ngo tit fung lut kom tor, ngo mai sit pun?"(You guys ate so many of my roasted chestnut, it'd be a loss for me right?) So Pearl got abit peeved and said, "Ngo mai ke leong man ge lah lei mai lor fan sum lap lor!!"(I buy RM2 worth of roasted chestnuts and you can take back three roasted chestnuts!) It was out of anger that she said it.

You know what the stupid hawker did? He actually took back three roasted chestnuts!

My cousin Yong lost his temper and asked my Aunty Ping who was still nibbling the chestnut daintily to return that half a chestnut to the stupid hawker. He put it on the table and the hawker shouted in disgust, "SEK JOR YAT PUN CHAU PEI FAN AR?"(You've eaten half of it and you want to return it to me?!) So my cousin Yong threw it away, I mean it is a disgusting thing to do. But com'n! Customer service?!

So they didn't want to pick a fight with the hawker and walked away. Then the stupid hawker shouted after them, "Sek Sek Sek, FAN HUI OR SEI HEI LA". LOL. Let me translate this word by word. (EAT EAT EAT, GO HOME GO AND SHIT IT OUT UNTIL YOU DIE LA!!)..LOL. What a horrible hawker! 0_0

My mother asked me to be specific about which hawker it was since there are two. Well, it's the one next to the handphone stall and the hawker looks abit like the chapfan man in Mee Yoke.

Actually Petaling Street is very scary. All the vendors there are so freaky because they will call after you if you so much as glance at their items. If you take a step forward to their shop, they will start to put that particular item in a plastic bag for you already. Besides, it is so boring. They sell the same things! Every 3 to 4 shops and you get a repeat. It is just fake branded shirts, ugly cheap watches, dvds, fake branded bags and then fake branded shoes. The quality of the things just screams, "FROM PETALING STREET, UGH" and they are selling it at such high prices!! I can get similiar items(obviously not branded ones) for so much cheaper!

So what's all this rave about cheap things from Petaling Street? They have a starting price of RM200 for a 'designer bag' that at a glance people will immediately know it is from Petaling Street. If you are a person who needs to accessorise with OTT branded goods, you'll obviously be buying the real McCoy rather than bluffing yourself and the people around you with those degrading things. If you can't afford the designer bags, obviously you're someone who has no need for designer bags. And the t-shirts? HELLO. RM40 for a t-shirt? Why is that cheap again? IT'S NOT EVEN REAL!!

Petaling Street is only appealing for people who have never seen cheap things in their lives before. I've been to Sunway Pyramid, Malacca, Midvalley, Sg.Wang etc etc and I've seen things that I want for so much less, so it just really spoils it for me when I visit that sauna we call Petaling Street.

By the way, it is a dumb idea to put that green thing above our heads. Doesn't it resemble a green house? It does have the green house effect by the way.

Besides the stuffiness of the place, sliding limbs with other shoppers and stupid stingy hawkers, there are a few snippets of conversations that we managed to catch along the way.

There was a vendor who was making small talk with a customer. He asked the foreigner, "So where are you from, sir?" The customer replied cooly, "From a very poor country."

I was walking by this stall and one of the vendors timidly said, "er, m-mis-ss a-a-r.." and was cut off by the laughter of his other vendor friends and they shouted at him, "Hahaha, lei hai kom ngai ge meh?"(Hahaha, you call out like that wan ar?) Sort of like a trainee vendor I should think. Do they even have to go through training?!

Sigh. Dear Malaysians, if you have excess money to spend, don't bother going back there. Not worth the sweat, literally. Just let our tourists be wowed by it. You want cheap things? Come to me, I'll show you where.

**
Earlier in the day, I brought them to KLCC and towards the end of our trip, my Aunty Ping wanted to check out Aseana.

Aseana is a VEP(Very Expensive Place). I hate VEPs! It makes me feel very sad.

They had this rack selling 70% and 80% discounted clothes. Obviously you'll feel happy right when you see such discounts?

How about RM1250 for a piece? A sheer kebaya for RM1250? And on a rack where germs from the filthy public can fall upon the material? THESE THINGS SHOULD BE PUT IN GLASS CASINGS WHERE HIGHLY TRAINNED PROFESSIONALS CAN TAKE IT OUT AND LAY IT UPON A VELVET SURFACE FOR YOU TO ADMIRE.

My cousin Yong and me were discussing how many trips we can take out of Malaysia and how many handphones we can get with that amount of money. Sigh.

I know they are designer stuff but what is the rasional, really?

We walked into this shop(we were the only customers, obviously) which has designer labels of all kinds with the ugliest clothes you have ever seen. Even Melinda Looi's creations there were pretty disappointing. Amidst the ugly sequinned things that can never be carried off by anyone other than models was a sofa set with a table in the middle. My tired mother, cousin Yong and Pearl sat there while my Aunty Ping peered around the shop inquisitively. (I asked her why she liked those VEPs, to which she replied, "I pretend I am at an art exhibition where I am surrounded by beautiful things!") So I joined my family at that tiny seating area amidst clothes than can pay for my education.

On the table, there was this pathetic looking fake plant with bright bloomed pink flowers stuck onto brances and the plant was without leaves. So I was telling my cousin Yong that the plant isn't scientifically correct. Without photosynthesis, how can the plant have such nice bloomed flowers?? Then he nodded his head intellectually and went on about how if the soil is full of nutrient, that would be possible. I nodded my head intellectually back at him. My mum and pearl then joined in the discussion with some Q&A's. Our conversation then led on to a topic about how expensive the clothes are and why are they so expensive.

I then piped up and said, "Do you realize we are just sitting here in a VERY VERY EXPENSIVE PLACE and discussing about the logic behind their decorative plant AND complaning about their overpriced items despite being their only customers?!" My Aunty Ping then said, "Yea, all we need is some McDonald's take-away to complete the picture."

LOL. We are such cheapos.

However, Times Square was farrrr better compared to KLCC where I could afford zero things from the 2nd floor to the 4th floor. At least in Times Square, there are so many shops there that they don't even care if it is branded or not. Hell, I saw a sundress in Geb for Rm19.90!! Didn't have enough time to stop for a look. So sad. Must make a trip there!


Taken from Kinokuniya's window! The workers at KLCC park cleaning the bottom of the fountain with some vacuuming device! So it is very shallow. I see.


The latest Marian Keyes book. 3 months ago it was RM60+. Now it is half the price! Of course must buy la!


Rm3.50 for a jar! Mini jar actually. But it is those multi-hued glitter that at its cheapest is usually RM11.50. And this are stationary glitter. I have never seen such beautiful stationary glitter. Perfect for making cards and decorating nails.


Got this at Times Square's Bonita! Another nice Bonita! I couldn't resist this pair! It had BABY BLUE GLITTER. I love Baby blue. I love glitter. There is no better reason to buy it. It's RM16. But hey, love overcomes money anytime.


Ooooo..look at the beautiful baby blue glitter. Heart,heart. Anyone remembers by Nose clogs I bought last year somewhere in September? It had a transparent strap with a babyblue glittery flower right in the middle? Well, the exact same shade of glitter. Wonderful.


My purchases from that accessories shop on Petaling Street. RM1 for the velvet-ish scrunchie and RM1.50 for each of the chop stick.

Jayelle's back and neck ached at 3:33:33 am
  (21) glitter balls rolling.  | 

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Hi, my name is Jolene and if there is a question in your head, this answer will definitely answer it: I was wrong and irrational. I was being a woman.


Jolene Lai, Jolene Lai,
Came to life in January and not July,
She is 19 years of age,
Can't wait to earn her own wage,
This dental student is home sick,
Will never be in Kedah for more than three weeks.

Subang Jaya is where she's from,
The only place she'll ever call home.
Has a boyfriend, a brother and a dog,
The things she says can give you a shock.

Especially for her father, who always gets a heart attack when he reads this blog.

Hey, rhymes!
 

Why The National Service Entries Ended.

My favourite posts:
Please Don't Take My Orange Away (9/03/05)
Flasher On MSN! (28/4/05)
Looking Back From Where They Left Off (8/10/05)
A Bottle Of My Bestest Friends In The Whole Wide World!(13/2/06)
Diary Extracts For Him From The Yesteryears (23/3/06)



Love proclamations and hate mails can go to jolenelai@gmail.com

Money can be sent to an address upon request.

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Forever Pimping..


SmashpOp.  Love the colours.

My Current  Blogger Crush...


Benjamin dunnowhat Sew Jin.
SO FUNNY. I LIKE~~.


Shading Some Light On...



Two sisters. Two shopaholics.
Direct suppliers from Taiwan, shopping online for good bargains, 99% cheaper than the bargains in the stores..and they're bringing it all to you. What more could you want?

 
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